My Thoughtful Spot

fashion friday: nude shoes

One of my favorite things to buy is shoes. It's right up there with make-up, tied for first. Last spring/summer there was a great development in the shoe world: nude colored shoes. I am a huge fan of neutrals that are a lighter shade. Being so pale myself, black makes me look like I glow in the dark. So any shades from chocolate to nude are good for me. Here are a couple of shoes I've been oogling lately...

So many options! For jeans, summer dresses, flirty skirts... Now I need a job so I can go shopping!     

fashion fridays: alice in wonderland

Yes, I know I'm an Urban Decay addict (thanks to my sister Kate). But how could you not be, with their amazing colors and primers and glosses and...

Sorry. You get the point. Anyway, they've just released a new set of eyeshadows that are inspired by the upcoming Alice in Wonderland starring Johnny Depp. And these shadows, while not unique to the set, are all renamed with appropriate Alice-isms, go great in almost any combination, and are a much better value than if you bought them separately. Plus two eyeliners and a mini primer potion? I didn't even need that thrown in there to make me want the set.

In front of the mirror is a little 3D scene of Alice in Wonderland. So flipping cool.

It is not, I repeat, not an option that I own this!

fashion fridays: yoga clothes

Yeah. I'm here. Hi. I completely got caught up in the holidays; from Christmas to New Year's and beyond. So the first part of my blog sojourn was due to celebrations and fun and a bit of hibernation from the electronic world. A much needed break. The second part of my departure comes every January and is somewhat depression-induced. Not that I'm depressed, but I always get the blues after the holidays and lost all motivation to return to the blogosphere.

I'm largely over it, and ready to jump back into it with fashion fridays. I'll get to the Christmas and New Year's recaps, even if everyone is tried about hearing about everyone else's holidays. I'm just taking my turn a little later!

So the reward for completing the studio-wide 30 day Bikram challenge in November was a 40% pass for all regular priced merchandise at Lululemon. But the pass wasn't idefinite; it needed to be used by December 31st, or lost forever. Which was a little silly, considering that people are usually buying presents and hosting parties/dinners and spending more than usual already. There is definitely not extra money in the budget for yoga clothes.

Once the holidays were over, I discussed it with Daniel and 40% off was just too good to pass up, so I did go and get a few things on the last day possible. It was the day after I had completed 60 yoga classes in 60 days, so it was a great reward as well.

A bit of background: the choice of clothes (or lack thereof) in a 110 degree room is very personal. Many people choose to wear very little: bra top and short shorts, bra top and mid-thigh shorts, bra top and form fitting cropped pants. Not me. I wear a tank that covers my midsection and PANTS. Loose fitting pants. I just don't enjoy looking at my cellulite in the mirror for 90 minutes. It's discouraging, you know?

I had been to the lululemon website before heading into the store and was not optimistic, especially regarding the tops I had to choose from. Even if I wanted to show my mid-section, I have never been able to find a fully supportive sports bra that fits me. I'm relatively narrow around with lots to fill cups with. My sports bras usually consist of underwire and 4 hooks ordered from a specialty store. Their bras were nice and I tried them on, but it was a no-go. I got two tank tops to wear over my armor.

On to pants. These pants fit, but they didn't leave much to the imagination. I wanted to go up a size (I don't care about that; it's just a number) to get more room through the butt and thighs. But the girl said they weren't supposed to fit that way and wouldn't provide the support they were designed to give. FINE. The cool thing is that they had free hemming and the pants can be turned inside out if you want all black.

 

Then I picked out a pair of relaxed fit cropped pants. These are more my speed. I like the crop to fall a little lower so as to not emphasize my calves, which are the envy of all drag queens. But they're comfy and I like the way they fit the butt and thighs, so I got them.

I wanted to get a warm up jacket so I could retire my Eyore sweatshirt I've been wearing to and from the gym for years, but they were pretty pricy (like everything else) so that'll have to wait.

What are your preferences regarding workout clothes? Any practical restrictions like my bra situation?

fashion fridays: christmas tanks

This week has been an odd one weather-wise for us. Normal southern California winter weather is about mid 50s, especially in December. Which is perfect sweater-don't-really-need-a-jacket weather. Excellent timing for me to bring out my ONE Christmas sweater -- the one I only wear around the house and at mom's.

But I can't! Yesterday I was driving around and the car thermometer said 80. That's 80 degrees Fahrenheit. On December 17th. Clearly sweaters, Christmas or otherwise, are not in my future, at least until things cool off to the mid 60s sometime next week. But it's Christmas! What am I supposed to do about my festive attire?

Then I got to thinking... what do they do in the southern hemisphere? Christmas... tank tops?? That must be it. But I asked a bloggy friend who lives in New Zealand, and she said they don't really exist. (But that she'd love an American Christmas "jumper"!) Bummer. They'd be a big hit; maybe we should go into business together.

I did some searching on google and found that they already exist. (Guess I'll have to stick it out in the medical industry, such as it is.) Here are some cute ones I would totally wear.

How cute is that little chick?!?

I really love that Seinfeld episode. So I would love wearing this one.

I guess I qualify as a baby yogini now, so I could wear this one, too!

Tell me, truthfully... you want a cheesy Christmas sweater that lights up, don't you? Alright, maybe not that far. But anyone can wear Christmas socks! (I have at least a dozen pair!

fashion fridays: book of shadows

I'm almost done Christmas shopping. One more person to finish buying for and one gift to pick up when it arrives at the store (to save on shipping).

This past Wednesday, my arms were, once again, heavy-laden with bags full of goodies and Christmas cards. (Addressing to commence this weekend.) As I was twisting and weaving my way through the people in my local Macy's, my eye caught sight of the Urban Decay counter. I slowed down... stopped. In front of an amazing color palate...

The Book of Shadows, Vol. II. The girl, who came over almost as soon as she saw my pace slow, said that Vol. I sold out almost instantly and these were going fast. I inquired about the price, but since I was still holding onto my bags, I said thank you and continued on my way. As I was leaving, my head was swimming.

• "I'll have to tell Daniel."
• "But by the time he gets around to shopping for me, they'll probably be gone."
• "My friend suggested I should get a little something for me while I was out today..."
• "I did get some extra birthday money from Mom. She suggested I spend it on some tropical fish, but it was just a suggestion."
• "Am I too old to wear these colors? I did just turn 34, after all."
• "I usually get my colors picked out for me by the girls at the counter and they tell me how to wear it. If I got this, would I be able to use all the colors without looking like an absolute whore??"

This all took about 15-20 paces to process, when I decided to just freaking get it. Because if I didn't, and they sold out, I would be really disappointed. So I got it. And I've been playing around with color. That gorgeous, rich color. As I was finalizing my purchase, I mentioned to the girl that I was a little intimidated about how to combine different shades. She threw several combinations on the back of her hand in about 45 seconds, emphasizing that they were designed to go well together and it was really hard to make a mistake. The middle rows were the "base" colors and the ones on the top and bottom were for pops of color. Seemed easy enough. I wouldn't remember her combinations exactly, but I felt somewhat better about my abilities.

And, for once, a salesperson didn't lie. It's been fun. Edgy. Pretty. Everything I love about Urban Decay.

fashion friday: sales sales everywhere!

I had some very specific plans for Black Friday shopping. For whom to buy and where to go for each person. I was going to make some serious progress towards finishing my Christmas shopping.

There were so many incredible deals going on yesterday. For people on my list, yes, but also for me. Half off your whole purchase at Ann Taylor Loft. 40% off your whole purchase at Ann Taylor. Buy one get one free cashmere sweaters at Banana Republic. 40% off the whole store at Jimmy Choo shoes. So many more that I can't remember. Or I averted my eyes because if my brain registered their super-savings goodness, I would stop shopping for others and shop for myself.

There were definitely many deals designed to give people a lot for their money; retail's answer to the Great Recession (as I'm calling it). My greatest deal came in the junior's section at Macy's: a pair of jeans, a long-sleeve graphic t-shirt, a long cardigan, and a plaid sweater/light coat all for $66!  By looking at the malls, it would have been tough to tell that there was a recession going on at all! I wonder how today's Black Friday registered in the history of Black Fridays and if that frenzied buying will persist through the holiday shopping period.

So, did anyone score really great deals out there?? What was your biggest coup?

fashion fridays: skinny jeans

In the last couple of months, I've noticed that I post about something fashion related on Fridays. From beauty to fragrances to actual clothes, it's a theme that I've noticed in my writing. So let's make it official. Fridays at My Thoughtful Spot will now be Fashion Fridays.

Usually I try to be somewhat stylish. I like to go shopping, but can't blow tons of money on the latest trends. After working for several years in retail, I've developed a bit of a knack for seeing what is going to last just for one season, and what is likely to persist over several. I'm not always right, but at least I try.

One of the more disturbing developments in fashion that I've seen is the skinny jean. I wish it was just going to be here for a season but it will likely stick around for much longer. Here's the problem as I see it. It's something that is very popular and it's made popular by skinny models. See? The required body for these jeans is in it's very title. Skinny jeans.

As most of us know, Americans are fat. Even if you're not fat, you've likely got a few areas that shouldn't be broadcast to the world, as they will be in a pair of skinny jeans which can hide nothing. Because of the hormones in our bodies, most of the excess poundage in women is deposited in the butt and thigh areas. So put a pair of skinny jeans on someone who has a modestly generous behind/thighs and it's like a giant arrow pointing upwards, magnifying the generous butt into a "OMG, look at the size of her ass!" (I tried to find a picture of a normal sized person in skinny jeans to illustrate my point, but I couldn't find any. Which also proves my point. If people think they look hot, they usually take their picture and post it all over the internet.)

I've read things in magazines and online that claim that almost anyone can wear skinny jeans, you just need to find the right fit. After trying on many pairs myself and seeing even more pairs on average people who are out and about, I have determined that those people are wrong. After squeezing my muscular thighs and generous butt into a pair in the dressing room, I couldn't peel them off fast enough. And seeing girls walk around in them? Well, like I said. Arrow. Pointing to something that is magnified. That's not to say that some girls don't pull them off. There are plenty of skinny bitches in southern California who can. I applaud them and their boy-shaped bodies.

But I like my curves. I just wish fashion would cooperate with all of us. Skinny jeans for skinny people and another equally cooler alternative for the rest of us.

What are your thoughts on skinny jeans? Success? Scared? Don't give a crap?

cute or smart?

When Daniel and I were visiting my family a few weeks ago, I had the chance to have the ultimate girly moment with my sister: we put our make-up on together. So we're there.. chatting, laughing, painting... and she pulls something out of her bag that caught my eye with a sparkle. Glitter eyeliner. I simply had to try it. And decided as soon as I was going to get home, I was going to get some for myself.

I've seen the sparkle make-up trend before and actually participated by buying glitter mascara to go on top of regular mascara. But this? This was COOL.

But then I started thinking. Glitter make-up is pretty casual. And I experience enough age discrimination at work. ("HOW old are you, exactly?" "How long have you been a doctor?" "You look so YOUNG!") So I decided not to wear the glitter eyeliner when I see patients in the office to discuss surgeries. But the other days, including days in the OR, I thought could be glitter optional. I didn't want it to destroy any credibility as I described how I was proposing to cut into someone; I get it.

One morning, all giddy from the glitter on a non-office day, I posted my sparkled-out status on facebook. Most people were supportive and loved the idea of a diva doctor. But then one comment really struck me: "The sad part is that the first impression of cute will make people think ditsy and then you have to prove yourself. I would recommend a white lab coat, hair in a bun, and glasses."

I always wear a white coat because I get tired of being mistaken for a nurse. Not that there is anything wrong with being a nurse, but that is not my degree. That comment goes way beyond glitter eyeliner and implies that someone who is pretty cannot be taken seriously and should "ugly" herself up if she wants people to think she is smart. I resolutely refuse to play the school marm role. If the Fox News babes have done anything for we women, it's shown that you can be both hot and smart.

vip event? yes, please!

I have a little problem. I'm getting to that age where I need to wear makeup. To brighten the eyes, diminish under eye circles, even complexion, and, of course, to get deadly eyelashes. My problem is that I'm completely clueless on how to navigate through the endless choices out there. Colors, concealers, plumpers, blushes, powders... it's like you need a separate degree to figure it all out. And I'm pretty much done studying.

Over the last nine months or so, I've gained a powerful ally at the Lancome counter at my local Nordstroms. Going to a make up counter in a department store can be hit or miss, as I've learned over the years. Some of the girls just don't know what they're doing when it comes to matching colors to complexions, whether it's foundation or that perfect shade of eye shadow.

My ally's name is Toni and she knows what works on me. She can even pick stuff out before I get there. Once, I went when Toni wasn't working. I asked for some pink eye shadow. I had unsuccessfully tried it before, but there must be a way it could work on me, right? The non-Toni girl tried some things on me. I knew it wasn't working, but I didn't know how to fix it or even how to express what was wrong. I think she knew something was wrong, too, because she asked her manager what she thought. She promptly came over, cried "Oh, no, that's all wrong. It looks like a bruise," and told her to take it off so the manager could do it.

Anyway, back to Toni. A few weeks ago, she called me (yes, Toni has my cell phone number) and told me they were having an internationally renowned make up artist come for a VIP one-on-one session and she immediately thought of me. I'm sure Toni said that to dozens of other people, but I was willing to overlook the hyperbole and signed up for the event without hesitating. After all, who doesn't want to have their make up done by a professional... just for the cost of a few items?

retail justice

As many of you saw in my New Year's Eve recap, I was wearing a lovely pink gown. It fit nicely, was floor length, and it was very comfortable. By and large, a rare finding.

When I got home and was getting ready for bed, to my dismay, I noticed that the evening bag I chose to wear with it had created dozens of pulls in the fabric on my left hip. There was nothing particularly odd about the evening bag; it had your typical sequins and beads over it. Well, maybe if I dry cleaned it, they would somehow miraculously shrink.

They didn't.

The dress came from a well-known retailer and I was shocked at the poor quality of the garment. Not in it's construction, which was excellent, but in the fabric choice. Who would have ever thought that an evening bag could damage an evening gown so much?

This past weekend, I gathered up my dress and my receipt with the hopes of getting a partial store credit for poor quality. Seemed reasonable to me. And even if it was against store policy, it was something that could be done for a good customer.

I arrived at the counter and told the girl everything. I hemmed it, I wore it, and my bag damaged it, which spoke obviously to the poor quality of the dress. She seemed sympathetic and called over her manager. Who wasn't sympathetic in the least. "Store policy says that we cannot return worn merchandise or merchandise that was damaged." I tried to explain to her that anyone could have damaged it, given the poor quality of the fabric. She stated that she had not had "many" complaints about that dress and maintained that she would not do anything. That's when I pulled out the big guns.

"Well," I said shrugging, "I'm more than happy to spend the clothing allowance for me and my husband at another store. Are you willing to send me to another store in this economy? Because that's where this is headed. I don't want to go somewhere else, but you're leaving me little choice."

Finally, reluctantly, she called over some other manager. As soon as he arrived, she told him my tale with her spin. That I damaged and wore it and wanted to return it. That's when the original cashier spoke up and tried to correct the inaccurate tale she was weaving. As soon as she finished, the bitch manager said, "I need to speak to you," and pulled the girl off to the side. I hope she didn't get in too much trouble.

The new manager said that he could see that I was a good customer and that he was willing to do the return based on that, but he made it clear that he was making an exception. He went on to explain that they are starting to use more delicate fabrics and that I would "need to be careful" in the future. Many such garments will have warning labels about the delicacy of the fabric. This one didn't, I promptly informed him. (For any of you who know me even a little, I'm exceptionally careful with all my things, especially clothes.) I told him I didn't want the money back on my card, or even the full amount in a store credit. He put the full amount back on my card anyway and saved a customer. I thanked him for doing this and expressed my disappointment in the quality. I also told him that the original cashier was very helpful, hoping to allay some of the tongue lashing she was no doubt still receiving.

I left, feeling vindicated.

What are your takes on the situation? Did I push it too far? Should I have just eaten the more than $100 I spent on the dress just to have worn it once?